This week, I am all about laughter & finding joy & hope in tough times. How else do we put one foot in front of the other, when the going gets tough if not to have an occasional light-hearted moment? If life is bumpy right now, find a way to relieve the pressure by participating in something that you know will put a smile on your face.
And I have to share this. Every time I watch I can’t help but start cracking up. Laughter is contagious, so if your life is good, go infect someone!!
At one of my events, someone asked me if my story of being ADHD was true. They said I was having fun & laughing too much for someone w/a “disorder.” 😀 Believe me, it took me a long time, but I did finally find the humor in living with ADHD & it has been a great blessing to be able to joke & laugh about it.
I like how Bill Cosby puts it: “Through humor you can soften some of the worst blows that life delivers. And once you find laughter, no matter how painful your situation might be, you can survive it.”
To get you smiling this morning here is a bit from one of my favorite comics, Jim Gaffigan:
One of the best things we can do is to make some time to laugh! People with ADHD have a gift for finding the funny in life and we should never forget to celebrate that. Sure we sometimes get a little inappropriate but a little correction from a friend doesn’t have to put out the flame of being funny.
To get the funny ball rolling, here is one of my wife’s favorite Brian Regan’s comedy bits:
I’ve found that even if I have the latest gadgets at my disposal to feed my creativity, nothing beats having a notebook or two where i can write down all my many ideas and thoughts, as well as brainstorm & come up with new drawings. if you’re looking for a low-tech way to stretch your imagination – get a notebook!
Tip from my wife: Being married to an ADHDer is a study in patience! It’s HARD to not want to come down on this person who just can’t seem to get their stuff together, but patience & kindness is more effective than yelling and guilt-mongering. Ask how u can help get the ball rolling. Then ask again & again & again.
My wife thinks that most ADHDers are messed up & have low self-esteem because ever since they were kids everyone has been yelling at them, telling them that they can’t do this right or that right, so it takes a while to “re-educate” them to start believing in themselves. And that doesn’t happen with more yelling and accusations of slackery and stupidity. She says, “tell the non-ADHD spouses that it is their responsibility to be an encourager and a helper. Being mean makes things worse.” I agree!
I’m told that being married to an ADHDer can be a bit of a challenge. 😀 My wife says that one of her biggest frustrations is that I can never finish a “home projects” in one go. I’m embarrassed to admit that there have been “honey-dos” around the home that should have taken me 5 hrs to complete, but instead took 2 yrs!
What are some struggles in your relationships with ADHDers? And how do you deal with the situations? My wife has fine-tuned the art of catching the right moment to get me back on track with lack-luster, but necessary tasks. She says, she tries to catch me while I’m rested, up-beat and on the cusp of some fun, adventure-filled activity. Of course, sometimes she just threatens to beat me up…Joking! 🙂
I love the word “perseverance”! I saw a cool quote on someone’s Facebook profile and thought it was perfect, it went something like: When you’re about to give up & throw in the towel, try to remember why you’ve hung in there for so long in the first place & let it inspire to go one more step further.
I know everyone has pressures to perform & expectations to live up to – day in and day out this can wear anyone down. So as you’re making your lists, trying meet deadlines, working on life & relationships, remember to take a break. Even a quick timeout to do something FOR YOU, can help you have a better attitude & a sense of renewal.
When you say “yes” to something, you’re saying “no” to something else. Are you saying “yes” to the right things? Make a list of things that are important to you & don’t take on anything new until after you consult this list. If the new project or responsibility doesn’t keep you close to the things you have determined are important in your life, turn the opportunity down – it’s probably just a distraction.
ADHDers tend to take on more than we can handle. Our quick minds tell us that we can get it done, but the laws of physics end up proving us otherwise. Plus there are only 24 hours in a day. I think I’ve talked about this before, but learn to say “no”. Think about the stress of everything you already have going on and make a decision to not add to it. Just say “no”!!
This week I’m challenging all of you to finish that project you started weeks ago that is still not done. It’s not an urgent project, but it’s an important one. It’s the one you start sighing guiltily about when it pops in your head. ADHDers have a really hard time wrapping things up unless the deadline is staring us right in the eyeball, but the non-urgent, IMPORTANT projects should get priority too!
I’d like to know how you’re going to reward yourself for completing one of your important, non-urgent projects this week. What fun thing will you be enjoying this weekend because you’ll get your project wrapped up once and for all? I think I’m going to go see Iron Man 2 and buy some new fishing tackle…:-D
I don’t know if it’s the special mix of ADHD traits like impulsivity, creativity & the inability to accurately judge time & resources, but ADHDers like going for the gusto. We’re passionate about our interests & if we’re not careful, our passion can consume us & isolate us from those around us. But in general, being passionate is a great thing & if properly channeled can lead to amazing things.
Being passionate about what you do often leads to success without that being your main priority. “Winners forget they’re in a race, they just love to run.” Which movie?
Whether you have ADHD or not, the process of personal development & growth is not a walk in the park. Why? Because most of the memorable, life-changing lessons, hurt. But the resulting eduction is usually invaluable. “Any process you are going through will get tougher before it gets easier. That’s what makes learning a gift. Even though pain is your teacher.” Which movie?
The key thing to remember is that if you do learn the lesson that life is trying to teach, in that particular area of your life, things do become more clear and you start responding to situations in a powerful, life-affirming way instead of being destructive. What is life teaching you now?
At the end of the day, life is all about effort; you get out of it what you put in. If you like “warming” the bench, life will pass you by, but get in the fray and amazing things can happen: “If you put your effort and concentration into playing to your potential, to be the best that you can be, I don’t care what the scoreboard says at the end of the game, in my book we’re gonna be winners!” Which movie?