Excuses are a dead-end!

by Ben GlennADHDPosted on Comments are Disabled

I mastered Excuses 101 somewhere around the 5th grade. And I rode that wagon all through school, and to some degree, through college.

Having ADHD is hard enough when you’re in junior high/high school, but at least (hopefully!) you have parents and teachers helping you. When you move onto college, that structure, the support that used to be there is removed. You’re an adult now! No one is going to be hounding you to do your homework, reminding you to go to your next class or telling you how to balance studying with socializing. That’s really bad news for college students with ADHD, especially those living on campus.

The first thing, and you really can’t take control of your ADHD struggle unless you deal with this challenge, is to be very aware of any excuses that might be coming out of your mouth when you fail to do the things you’re supposed to be doing in order to keep up with classwork. Hard truth? No one cares! The bigger the school, the less likely will a professor take a special interest in you and your challenge. The most important thing to remember is that hiding behind ADHD and not taking charge of the challenges that go along with having it, will only hurt you in the long run. Don’t cheat yourself! I know you’re too smart for that!

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#81

by Ben GlennMusingsPosted on Comments are Disabled

A degree of structure & discipline should be maintained thru the summer. I like posting a list of rules where the kids can see them. I also believe in a reward/punishment system – nothing too complicated or military-like, but something that helps them grasp the concept of choices & consequences.

I think they key to this having any kind of benefit is two-fold: 1. You have to be consistent & stick with it and 2. You have to keep changing things up in the rewards department to keep it interesting for the kids and to keep them motivated to keep trying to do the right thing. I know that this is not a sure-fire way to get your kids to behave, and certainly the pay-off is not immediate, but without creating some kind of a well-defined reward/punishment system for kids to learn good behavior from bad, I really can’t imagine how they can become more manageable. Anyone else have any suggestions about teaching kids the concept of choices & consequences?

#45

by Ben GlennMusingsPosted on Comments are Disabled

Two weeks of travel can wreak havoc on my “home schedule”. It takes me 3-4 days to readjust to home unless I plan ahead. Even though ADHDers tend to do well in fluid settings, we still need some structure to make getting and staying on task possible. Before going on a long trip, I write down where I left off on my top 2-3 projects and what needs to be done when I return. This is a great tool to help me get back on track with minimum drama.

If you’re a list-maker, it’s important to not make the list too long and expansive. A big to-do list will just overwhelm. Get your “sympathetic enforcer” to help with narrowing down the list to the most important and urgent items.